BBQ, Cole Slaw, and the Difference Between Right and Wrong

A good lesson from a horrible side dish

by Rick Howerton

Whenever I order a barbeque sandwich in North Carolina, I'm asked if I want cole slaw on it. The first time this was asked of me, I was a little grossed out. "Do people really like that?!" I asked. The response was, "Sure Howerton, a lot of people prefer cole slaw on their barbeque sandwich. It's a North Carolina thing."

I thought to myself, That's just wrong!

But it's not wrong to slap one of the most despised conglomerations on the planet on a sandwich—it's just a preference. These confused connoisseurs of fine cuisine probably grew up eating their sandwiches covered with cole slaw. So they prefer it with the stuff, rather than without it. The practice may make me cringe when they eat it in my presence, but there's nothing wrong with them having it.

In a similar way, there are a lot of things that cause some followers of Jesus to cringe—things that are simply preferences, not things that are wrong. These preferences have been established in many ways:

• Families instill customs
• Denominations create different sets of belief
• Peers can steer people a certain way
• A person's history may cause them to think differently.

Small-group leader and small-group member: be careful that you don't question a fellow follower of Jesus when they involve themselves in various activities. That is, unless the Bible specifically points out the wrongness of those activities.

Labeling preference as "wrong" or "right" damages us. It ties, gags, and jails those who have journeyed to the source of freedom. If you feel you have a weakness in this area, read Romans 14 to get a grip on God's view of "preference" and "wrong."

And by the way—I have recently learned to relish cole slaw on my barbeque sandwiches!

Rick Howerton is the "Small Group-Ologist" at LifeWay Resources. And while he refuses to explain what that actually means, we do know that he's got a lifetime of experience with discipleship and small groups.

posted by Sam O'Neal on August 11, 2009 11:24 AM