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July 11, 2011

Les Parrott on "Impossible People"

A helpful corrective on the common view of EGRs.



Crazy%20Person.jpg

I am currently putting the finishing touches on the next edition of our SmallGroups.com Digital Magazine (look for it during the first week of August), and that includes writing an article about "Problem People."

I won't give away too many of my thoughts just yet, but the process of writing did remind me of a great article written by Les Parrott on SmallGroups.com a couple years back. Here's the link to the whole article, but I am especially fond of what Les had to say in the conclusion:

Everybody is somebody's impossible person some of the time. But rarely is somebody everyone's impossible person all of the time. Oh, there are those few annoying exceptions that make it their mission to complicate everyone's existence—you can usually detect them when the mere mention of their presence elicits a resounding "Oh no!" from a group of people. But, thankfully, they are rare.

That's why a good rule of thumb is to remember that the difficulty you experience with most impossible people is in your relationship, not in the person. After all, someone you like very much might get along just fine with someone else in the group that you can barely bare. Impossibility, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.

That's a great thought, in my mind—a helpful correction to the idea that every group has someone who is especially difficult (and EGR) and needs to be "handled."

Anything you would like to add?

posted by Sam O'Neal on July 11, 2011 11:56 AM

Related Tags: Difficult people, Impossible people, Les Parrott

Comments

Les Parrott is right. We tend to think that the person is the problem, when in fact, it's the relationship. I used to have a great relationship with a gothic woman -- I'm a nerd -- and a very bad one with someone who was similar to me.

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